


Test Run

by goodmorningvietnam666



Series: Bring Back Jack [1]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: Coincidental Meeting, Comfort, Gen, Hiding Feelings, Intermission, Introversion, Post "The Doctor's Wife", Trust Issues, mostly canon compliant, self blame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2015-05-21
Packaged: 2018-03-31 13:04:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3979108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodmorningvietnam666/pseuds/goodmorningvietnam666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“How long has it been?”</p><p>It hung there and he wished madly he could snatch it back, but instead stayed perfectly mute and waited, hoping wildly that the repercussions wouldn’t be too harsh. </p><p>Thankfully: they weren't</p>
            </blockquote>





	Test Run

**Author's Note:**

> After a binge watch of the season, I had the insatiable urge to write fiction based on 'What if?" questions and this was one of my favourites.
> 
> Enjoy the read!

Night had fallen on the quiet planet and the environment had turned sleepy and slow. The TARDIS was quiet, gentle humming filling the otherwise silent interior as he swept around the console, checking this and that; was that turning properly, what did the scanner say, how did that get there, is that broken, is this still aligned. He was lost inside his work, determined to let it keep himself from thinking too hard about things of little import.

He had landed on this particular planet so that the TARDIS could consume the large reservoir of rift energy that hummed within the planet’s crust. So that she could have full power once more and so she could rest for a while too – given their last adventure he reasoned that they both needed it.  
Amy and Rory were both sleeping in their room, several corridors away and making no contribution to the noise of the TARDIS. He stayed awake of course – he had to make sure she was alright.

The fact was that he was still mad, still vibrating with anger at what that non-universe had tried to do to his home, his friend and his very life and purpose in it. He was afraid of lashing out at his companions too, and had tried to stay calm while they were awake, tried to remain reasonable, as close to himself as possible – he didn’t want any cause for alarm yet. 

A knock at the door startled him from his pointless gazing and he glanced at the door than back to the console, unsure if he wanted to answer the call or ignore it. 

But he was the Doctor: if someone requested his help he knew he would not deny them it. 

So he stood straight, adjusted his jacket and opened the door, casting his gaze upon the knocker. 

They both stood very still, frozen in action, for a very long moment, both shocked at their own discoveries before the Doctor opened the door a little wider and offered a soft smile.

“Jack?” he tried first, angling himself to get further out the door without his feet leaving the TARDIS – caution guiding him for the first time in a very long time. 

Said man offered the same sort of smile “You’ve changed”

“Yup” he supplied after a pause, tapping the frame of the door lightly with his fingertips in the form of a nervous tick “So, travelling?”

“Of a sort” Jack replied, a familiar smile finally reaching his eyes “Taking after you, if anything” here he lifted a wrist to display a Vortex Manipulator, battered and dinted after long years of use “Got it fixed… Needed a distraction”

“What happened to Alonso?” He asked tentatively, afraid for the answer but curious all the same. 

“He died… Hate how people do that” Jack replied in a simple way to hide his discomfort and then he chuckled for a moment “Always knew it was inevitable but…”

“It still comes as a surprise” the Doctor finished with a sad smile, and after reaching a decision, finally he pushed away from the door and stood aside “Come in”

And to his utter relief Jack did, stepping in shoulders first as was his way and shucking off his coat, hanging it on the rack nearby and stepping further into the TARDIS. 

The Doctor closed the door and led the way to the centre console, refraining from turning any dials and facing his old friend.

They stood in silence for some time, and even though he could accurately measure the moment that passed as minutes, time had a way of making it feel like hours. 

Time… Such a tricky old thing.

“I think I preferred the coral” Jack said to break the silence and the Doctor chuckled, running a fond hand over the closest part of the console. 

“I had a feeling you’d say that” he admitted, a smile present now, full and real for the first time tonight.

Silence fell again and admittedly it made him uncomfortable to see his friend fall into silence where he would normally speak; but he himself was never good at social cues and so remained silent. 

“New companions?” It was vague but the Doctor immediately took it as a lifeline. 

“Yes! A couple this time, they keep me on my toes, harder to watch than you or Rose” he answered, jumping on the question and flinching at the loudness of his voice as it echoed off the walls of the TARDIS.

He finally drove up the courage to ask the question on his mind after another pregnant silence between them, and opened his mouth, closing it when nothing came out and then trying again. 

“How long has it been?”

It hung there and he wished madly he could snatch it back, but instead stayed perfectly mute and waited, hoping wildly that the repercussions wouldn’t be too harsh. 

“Not that long, maybe fifty years or so – after about 200 or so passing you don’t really feel that small of an amount – it’s okay, I knew I’d see you again soon enough” Jack answered, folding his arms and leaning against the railing opposite the console, his expression unreadable.

“You’ve changed” the Doctor said and it felt oddly reflective. 

Jack nodded “I’d say I’ve grown up a little more, come to understand the universe a little better even”

He grinned “You think?”

Jack laughed softly “I know Doc – the things I understand now would have baffled the person I was who you first met – I’m glad I met you, you’ve taught me so much”

He held back the ‘me too’ threatening to surface, afraid of what the response would be, so he nodded instead. “What are you doing on this planet anyway?”

“Rift energy – and also answering a call – I was planning on leaving tonight, then I saw the TARDIS and figured I’d knock and see how you were” Jack answered, wriggling his shoulders in an effort to get comfortable “Which reminds me, I still haven’t asked, how are you?”

He took a bracing breath and drummed his fingers on the nearby console, watched his friend for a reaction and let the air go with a soft ‘whoosh’ noise “I’m…” he struggled for words and glanced in a frenzied way around the TARDIS for some form of inspiration. 

“The same as when we last met?” Jack offered after he had said nothing for five minutes. 

“Well, that depends on what ‘the same’ implies” He assented, ducking his head and running a hand through his hair.

This time it was Jack’s turn to take pause and look around the TARDIS slowly, his eyes eventually meeting the Doctor’s in a steady, cautious gaze “Sad? Angry? Confused? Take your pick Doc, you were all of them”

They were both silent after that, neither knowing what to say or where the conversation was going, and the Doctor fiddled with the console again, determined to keep his gaze on his ship rather than his friend. After minutes he stopped, unable to avoid the question, the inevitable result of his dawdling rising up to meet him as he spoke “Mad… mostly mad”

Jack regarded him for a moment, expression unreadable, and closed the distance between them, standing beside him at the console, leaning his hands on the console and sighing, lifting one hand as though it weighed a tonne and settling it on his shoulder firmly. 

They stayed like that for maybe half an hour and the Doctor found himself anchored by that hand, unable to tear away either physically or mentally and for some reason it made him feel calm, like the storm inside him was suddenly coming to an end and he let a laugh pass his lips, flinching at the noise and lifting his gaze from the console, casting it around the TARDIS slowly. 

“What a daft old man I’m turning out to be” he muttered, rocking himself gently and looking around again “Where’ve you been?”

“Clearly not where I was needed” Jack replied, and when the Doctor turned to him his friend’s gaze was on the console, giving nothing away. The hand on his shoulder tightened its grip in the form of a squeeze “These new companions… you don’t talk to them all that much do you?”

“Nope” he replied, shaking his head “I… I don’t want to break them”

Jack chuckled, but it wasn’t cruel or out of humour, it was merely something to fill the silence that passed “We break ourselves mostly – you’re still there afterwards with a guiding hand – you’re more or less the remedy”

“I don’t think you’re helping” he replied in a sullen tone, their conversation only succeeding to fuel the guilt in his hearts. 

“I don’t know if I’m trying to help” Jack replied, a sigh creating a pause “I think I’m just talking for the sake of it… I’m not your remedy”

“No” he replied “But you’re a friend… thank you, even if this was just for the sake of it”

“Sun’s coming up” Jack commented after another bleak silence and the Doctor brought his attention to the door, then to his friend and he heaved out a sigh, trying to convince himself to speak. 

“I… come travelling with us” he asked and it felt achingly familiar, the same question he’d asked all those years ago, he held his breath and watched his friend because he didn’t want the rejection again, didn’t know if he could stand it, of watching Jack Harkness, the man who would never die, walk out of his door again for the fact that he was who he was.

Closed off.

Afraid.

Jack’s gaze fell from his and he regarded the environment with another unreadable expression, his free hand drummed its fingers along the console and he bit his lip in thought “I…”

He cut his friend off, he hadn’t meant to, but he raced to the conclusion that he wouldn’t like the end of that sentence “Just for a little while… like a test run?”  
Jack offered a smile and it was real and so _Jack_ that it made the Doctor smile too. The hand on his shoulder squeezed again and then he was pulled close and tight “I won’t say no – not now”

“Why not now?” he asked, dazed from the sudden display of affection that he had so sorely missed in Jack’s absence

“Because you” Jack paused to laugh and it felt surprised “You need your past to catch up to you – you need someone who knows you… guess that’s going to be me” and his friend pulled back with a teasing grin “For a test run”

The Doctor smiled and nodded “For a test run”


End file.
